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Tuesday, December 7, 2010

Thoughts On Memories and Making Memories

MEMORIES...scattered pictures on my blog....time we shared with each other..twas the way we were......Her First Christmas! I took these pictures so I wouldn't forget how cute she was! Zoey is 10 weeks old.
Ho,Ho,Ho! Can You Believe they let me make them Santa Dog and Santa Kitty? Zoey ,our new baby, was drowsy, and I don't think she even knew it was on her head! Sweetie wears hats and coats in the winter,so it's no real biggie for her.
I have put up a few things for Christmas cheer, but still haven't mustered up the umph to put up the tall tree.

I ate lunch with my mother, and then we went to put winter arrangements on Daddy's grave. The 5th was would have been Mama and Daddy's anniversary. I am 61, and They had been married a few years before I was born.

After coming home from the cemetery, I sat here on the sofa, and got lost in thought. I never heard them argue when I was growing up. NEVER. What a great thing to be able to say! I'm sure they must have had some "intense fellowship" , but they were wise enough to keep it from us. Instead, they worked on making happy memories, whether they knew it then or not.We have all told them how much those happy times meant to us,though.(Not to say I don't have some very "jarring" was the days when misbehavior could earn you a few good smacks on the backside!)

You know, I feel such gratitude for so many fun and happy days with my parents. Did  my parents know they were making memories that are yet frozen in time in my heart?Maybe there were times when they might have thought secretly "I'd just rather not", but almost every weekend, Mama and Daddy would plan something "to do" as they called it.

We were not rich,nor poor .....but there wasn't money to go on long vacations or expensive outings. We went fishing,went on picnics,went to fly kites on a levee near or home, Little League baseball games, fairs, parks, and drive-in theaters or just backyard barbeques and badminton. It was rare to go shopping unless it was to get 'school clothes" or groceries.There were no malls that I had ever heard of ,and technology had not robbed children of enjoying a whole day outside with parents and neighbors on the block just enjoying each other's company.

I tried to do the same for my kids while they were growing up.  I probably had a sitter no more than 20 times in all my child raising years. We didn't really care to hang out with adults who wanted to have their fun without the kids.We made friends with other couples who enjoyed including the children in most activities. I felt that childhood would go by quick enough, and chances to spend  time with them would be like a vapor. Here today.........and gone so quickly.

I hope they remember our picnics in the park, rides to nowhere that ended up being  a food fest in the car,the pool we assembled and enjoyed ,church plays,Little League,cooking together in the kitchen, planting our little garden, me playing Barbie Dolls with the girls.My son and I kicking around the car lots and ending up buying a car.........and yes,even strolling the mall.....I hope they are lasting memories to them. I know I treasure them! I'm so glad now that I spent time with my chidren instead of doing like some mothers I knew, leaving their children  with whoever they could ,day in and day out ,and going out to party most weekends. Think of what they missed!

Young parents, what about you? Are you making happy memories? Do you let your children know that you WANT to spend time with them? 

Young parents, do you look for any excuse to "get away"from your children?  (Too tired,too busy,too broke,too sick.....)I Is your "quality time" anytime you aren't with the kids? I  remember when my daughter was in stage three cancer,Hodgkin's lymphoma.I took care of her baby boy except for bath and bottle time. She insisted on doing it herself.She would drag her tiny frail body and kneel down at the tub to play with bath toys and bathe her son. It hurt me so to see my daughter, bald and exhausted to the core muster a smile and play with him. She made memories for herself, and in so doing for me.She survived ,and over the past few years has had serious health problems. She is a wonderful mother, and even while sick is always planning the "next thing" to do with her three children.
Grandparents, the same goes for us. When we are gone, will our grandchildren remember good times spent together,or will they remember being ignored  or being told to "go away and play"? Let's make happy memories!


  1. An excellent post! Yes, if we don't make happy memories with our children they are missing out on so much!
    My heart skipped a beat as I read of your daughter's illness. I am sorry.
    Your pets look so cute in their Santa hats.

  2. Hi Jackie, Great post...Yes--it is important to make memories... I have so many great memories of growing up in my small town in VA. My parents were so good to me --and I had a wonderful childhood also. My Daddy died in 1969 and Mom died in 1991. I miss them both.

    I also made lots of memories with my own children. We were a family who always did things together also. I treasure those moments.

    These days though, I'm not close to any of my grandchildren much --since they all live so far away. I miss that relationship --but it's just the way it is.


  3. Wonderful post. I was a child in the 50's so know what you're talking about. As a grandma now I know how important it is to be there for our kids and make those memories. It's our legacy to them. They will create it for their children because they had it themselves.
    Thanks for sharing you wonderful insight.

  4. Hi Jackie... Lovely post but most of all it is spoken in truth. We do the best we can and hope and pray that it makes a difference. Sometimes memories are all we have left...
    Thanks for sharing ....

  5. Jackie, this was an excellent post :) and did it ever bring back the memories. I'm 63, so I know what you're talking about. NOTHING was better than those days of "no technology" and spending that time outside with games and friends and family. You hit the nail on the head. I've often wondered what young kids have to remember now. It's not the same.
    Now your pets, that's adorable! I'm so glad you've started on photos of Zoey while she's young, and Sweetie is one accommodating pooch to wear the hat even though it's been done before, lol. Don't you wonder what they're thinking, hahaha.
    But Jackie, I had no idea about your darling daughter and her fight with lymphoma. I am sorry from the bottom of my heart. You are one strong woman. XOXOXO

  6. Jackie, this was beautiful and yes we have loved all our pets and at different times we think about all the good times they all gave us. Each having their special little tricks and loving personalities and naughty ways.
    My son had a pig dog and we were renovating a car and after having the seat newly upholstered and put in the shed to store out of the way. This little (not little really) got into the shed and chewed them to pieces. Gosh he was in the dog house fora while thats for sure.


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I'm Totally Southern,Y'all !

I'm Totally Southern,Y'all !